On Finding Myself in the Otrovert: The Gift of Not Belonging
F or as long as I can remember, I’ve considered myself an introvert. Crowds drain me, small talk feels tedious, and my best moments come in quiet reflection or one-on-one connection. Yet, even as an introvert, I’ve noticed something curious about myself: I thrive in certain social roles. I can stand in front of a room as a supervisor, perform on stage, speak publicly, or act as a public spokesperson—and during those moments, I am fully alive, alert, energetic, and connected. And then, just as quickly, the spell ends. The crowd disperses, the meeting closes, the applause fades—and I retreat, grateful to return to solitude. In his 2025 book The Gift of Not Belonging , psychiatrist Rami Kaminski introduces the term otrovert—derived from otro, meaning “other” in Spanish—to describe a distinct personality orientation not fully captured by the familiar introvert-extrovert spectrum. The term otrovert— someone who does not naturally seek belonging in groups but can engage deeply in cho...